Thoughtful

Photo via pinterest 

Is it possible to be so full of ideas, dreams, frustrations, that one cant get anything done.
when the heart is so full, of what sometimes I'm not sure, that nothing can escape the dam of emotions and thoughts and all the kinds of things that float through my head at 2:00 in the morning.
its like there is no room for the creativity that I crave, when my mind is a beehive of chaos and things that need to be done. Writing helps, when I write its like I open a vein and bleed the thoughts and desires and dreams and the too many frustrations that come with life. My pen becomes the lifeline I so need, when I write I grow wings, metaphorically speaking, and my heart lightens.
Talking to someone helps, but sometimes there are feelings that are too weighty, too far locked away in the heart that cant be shared easily, and writing them down makes it a little easier.
Now I wont go into a huge chronicle about my personal existence, but after looking deep into my cup of steaming peach tea for a few moments, I realized that I have been running from this blog, even though I promised myself that I would post at least once a week. I have been wondering in my random posts about things no one cares about is boring the readers that stop in and say hello.
Probably more than I would care to think, but that got me thinking about why I started this blogging journey. It wasn't more for he readers and the audience I could reach, yes that was a factor but, in the short of it, this blog was more for me as an inward journey, and to become a better writer. And as I am writing and thinking, the onset of autumn always does it to me, I feel I am becoming more myself than I Have been in weeks. So onward on this journey, free from the thoughts and worries that boggle me about the direction of this blog. I really don't have to write great dissertations that are thought provoking and always teach something. Those might come sometimes, but for the most part I have to be me.
Now to something more lighthearted or what some would call an update.
Hopefully soon a new design will meet your eyes when you visit, this is something I am hopelessly bad at, and it is rare that I find something I cant remotely do. Remotely. Ignore that last point.
This is the queen of random signing off for now.